When I was growing up, all the teachers would tell us was that "boys are stinging nettle"😂 If you let them touch you as a girl, they will sting you😂 Those who grew in the 80s and 90s know that parents were not talking about sex with their children. It would be seen as shameful or a taboo. This meant that no one would closely guide teenagers on controlling their sexual desires.
Growing up, I have not seen men being stinging nettle as those teachers would warn us. Infact, the organ that made them tell us that is one of the organs that make women's butt lips clap in excitement. Anyway, that kind of sexual education was vague as it portrayed a gender in a bad light instead of teaching us that teenage sex is not advisable.
Sex should not be portrayed to teenagers as a bad act, shameful or a taboo. It should be introduced as the beautiful act as it is. However, the teenagers need to know it is only beautiful when it is done at the right age with the right person. So sex education for teenagers should be about abstinence and self control.
So, how do you teach teenagers abstinence??
♦️Teach them how to say NO without feeling guilty. Tell them they don't have to do what their peers tell them to. It is okay to turn down a peer who wants them engage in irresponsible sex and they should not be sorry about it.
♦️ Teach them how to direct their minds elsewhere. When they feel that urge for sex, they should engage on other activities like sports, hobbies, excercise, reading, puzzles (mostly teenagers contemplate sex when idle)
♦️Teach them how to choose friends. Let them Learn how to keep off peers who are encouraging them to have irresponsible sex. Most teenagers engage in sex due to peer pressure.
♦️Make sure they avoid improper entertainment. Let teenagers keep off watching films where sex is portrayed as okay for teenagers. There's alot of sexual content in media. Mind what films your teenagers watch.
♦️Let them know sex in early teenage years would lead to regrets when they're older. Research studies show that most teenagers who engaged in irresponsible sex while 15 or 16 regret by the time they're in their late 20s or 30 when they understand themselves better.
♦️ Let them be aware of the consequences of Teenage sex... Pregnancies, STIs, negative outcomes in academics.
Let's raise a more aware generation. There's no shame in talking about Sex.
Parents, what challenges are you facing talking about Sex with your teenagers??
@ Joyce Mwai
Writer/ Teenager Mentor/ Parenting Coach
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